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Pieminister on Upper Street

Pieminister
Upper Street, outside St. Mary's Church
N1

Date of Last Visit: Thursday, March 12th, 2009

The Background: I've just taken my Life in the UK test! And passed! In 4 minutes. (24 questions that I went through twice.) Really, citizens of Britain, you might want to consider raising the bar a bit.Just a little.

If you don't know what the Life in the UK test is, it's the first step towards either settlement (as in permanent residency) or citizenship. Here are some of the things that were on the test. I'm not even going to tell you the answers.

Are there more women than men in the U.K.?
Where does the Prime Minister live?
What is the legal drinking age?
Who is the Queen's heir?
Who is eligible for free dental care?
What is the maximum speed limit on a single carriageway?

Yes, for a second there, I thought I was taking my driving test.

But hey, on my way back into work (after a celebratory lunch at Ottolenghi), I passed this Pieminister cart on Upper Street. It's a bit new, I think. Part of me wonders if they really needed all that real estate--it's very big, isn't it?--but hey, it's still a fun idea. Must check opening hours.

St. John Bread & Wine

St. John Bread & Wine
94-96 Commercial Street
E1 6LZ
Tel: 020 7251 0848
http://www.stjohnbreadandwine.com 

Date of Last Visit: Tuesday, September 9, 2008

The Victims: Feathers, Matt, Feathers' Little Brother

The Damage: £50 each

The Background: Feathers' little brother is in town for a visit. We had grand plans of Petrus and Royal Hospital Road and a meal out every night. Somehow, these grand plans of five fine meals in five days became two nights at St. John Bread & Wine and Geales. (More to come on Geales tomorrow.)

But that's okay because I've never been to either. So I'm excited. For one. (And for once.) Plus, last weekend, I went all the way to Denver and back without my Nokia N82 and gosh darnit but I missed it's 5 MP camera. And I'm also testing out Nokia's new Lifevine application, and tonight's my first night really using it. Yes, I've got a lot going on.

And God but I'm a sucker for GPS. Nokia's Lifevine (or nVine) in one sentence: It tracks me all over town and attaches the photos/music/movies to where I've been. It's neat. If a little weird from a privacy standpoint.

The Starters: The menu at St. John Bread & Wine is a bit unexpected. There are a lot of small dishes. And then there are maybe four large main dishes. So we order a bunch of small plates...the foie gras (nice), some langoustines (you know I don't work for my food, so I let Feathers' Little Brother eat all of these), an artichoke salad without any artichokes (we sent it back and got another--it was much nicer with the artichokes), and then a plate of zucchini and white beans that I would gladly eat every day for lunch. Our server made it seem like these were tapas size portions, but they weren't. They were just regular starter size portions.

 

The Mains: So they had grouse on the menu. I've never had grouse before. And nor will I ever again. It was dark and bloody. And cold. I like game. But this was too gamey for me. No photos for you, I'm sorry. You'll have to take my word for it.

But we also had the rabbit--rabbit for three! Unfortunately, the best part about it were the roasted carrots. I do like a nicely roasted carrot. But one cannot survive by carrots alone.

The Desserts: Now this is what makes me say I would gladly go back to St. John Bread and Wine. I like their desserts. Firstly, the blackberry meringue. Secondly, the cheesecake. The blackberry meringue, in particular, was one of the nicest things I've ever eaten. It was nice and chewy and sticky.

   

The Verdict: I wasn't so impressed with the starters and mains at St. John Bread & wine. But I haven't stopped thinking about the desserts since. Could one live by desserts alone? I think so.

Fox & Anchor

Fox & Anchor
115 Charterhouse St
EC1M 6AA
020 7250 1300

Date of Last Visit: A Wednesday or Thursday night in February.

The Victims: Geoff, Bevin, Karen, Chris

The Damage: Unknown. Bevin paid.

The Background: I've been wanting to try the Fox & Anchor for ages and having some American colleagues in town seemed like the perfect excuse. American colleagues are often in search of Fish & Chips in London. I thought the F&A might deliver on that aspect. No one got the Fish & Chips, but that is not my fault.

The Entrance: It's PACKED. This is not a relaxing place to have a meal on a busy night. Lots of traffic back and forth. Make sure you get a bench seat facing the bar...if you don't, you'll have people bumping into you all night.

Tap Water Test: Jug provided. Frequently refilled.

The Food: Steak and oyster pie. Pie was full of steak. That was good. But there didn't seem to be anything else in there? It was just steak. Is that weird? This was my first steak and oyster pie ever. Are they all like this? Why? I'm very confused. Was I ripped off? But the oysters were delicious and the side of spinach was nice.

Service: You know, it's interesting. After four years of blogging around town, I guess I must have low expectations of London servers. As long as they are cheerful and friendly and helpful, I can forgive most things. Because at the end of the day, cheerful and friendly and helpful is more than you get at most restaurants. So I thought our server was pretty good because she was cheerful and friendly and helpful. But as Geoff pointed out, she didn't seem to know a whole lot about anything on the menu.

The Verdict: Hmmm. The burgers looked great. And I liked the atmosphere. If I had friends in town from the U.S., I'd take them here for some upscale pub grub if they put in a specific request for pub food. But I wouldn't get the steak and oyster pie again.

British: Market

Market
43 Parkway
NW1 7PN
Tel: 020 7267 9700

Date of Last Visit: A Saturday night recently.

Victims: Al & Louise

Damage: £35ish for starter, main, dessert and lots of tap water.

The Background: We have been planning for ages to have an international dinner club, where we go all over London in search of interesting ethnic restaurants. Unfortunately for us, just like the French server I mentioned the other day, we too seem to be suffering from a bit of ennui. Outside of one sparsely attended Ethiopian meal, we've yet to make this a regular occurance.

Our tentative plans to head to New Malden for Korean fall through. So I suggest Market in Camden, which Dos Hermanos liked.

I read online that there's a small step into the restaurant, and to watch out for it because a lot of people fall INTO the restaurant. "A lot of people" is right. As our meal progresses, I lose track of the number of people who fall into Market. Someone is going to hit their head soon--if they haven't already. These guys need a ramp. Or a sign. Or both. I see stiches in Market's future. Maybe even a law suit!

Starter: Goat cheese tart. Too gooey. I am jealous of Lou's pig's head terrine.

Main: Pork belly. Side of dull knife. Crispy crackling. This was a bit of a challenge until I procured a sharper implement.

Service: Forgot to tell us about the specials. Wouldn't let Louise order her steak well-done. (Never ask well-done of a French server.) Other server was much better.

Wine List: VERY affordable.

The Verdict: Everyone seems to like this place. By everyone, I mean my boyfriend, famous London restaurant critic Giles Coren. I love Giles*. But I don't love Market.

*Giles isn't really my boyfriend. Except when I close my eyes.

British: National Dining Rooms

National Dining Rooms
National Gallery
Trafalgar Square
WC2N 5DN
Tel: 020 7747 2525

Date of Last Visit: Sunday, February 24, 2008

The Victims: Julie, Jen, Niculie, Kellie

The Damage: £35ish each?

The Background: Julie has bought us all tickets to the Vanity Fair exhibition at the National Portrait Gallery. We've paid her back, of course. But it was good of her to organize this. I like it when people organize weekend activities for me. I'm very good at showing up to events that other people have organized. I am also good at sitting around in my pajamas all weekend. These two things might seem unrelated, but they're not.

Finding the National Dining Rooms: As you're facing the National Gallery, the restaurant is in the building to the LEFT. Over by Canada House. I spent a while wandering in and out and around, looking for it. Don't do that to yourself.

The Service: Started out really well at first, but then grew distracted. Desserts took ages to arrive. We were all done with ours by the time Jen's showed up. (They just totally forgot to put her order in.)

The Bread: Hard! Really really hard to cut into.

My Starter: Butternut squash soup. Nice, but nothing spectacular. Needed salt.

My Main: Goosnargh chicken breast with black trumpet mushroom, grapefruit and spelt crumble. According to the Web site. However--I don't remember grapefruit being listed on the actual menu--just spelt crumble. I don't like grapefruit. At all. Uggh. I would not have ordered this if grapefruit had been listed on the menu. And they were sneaky about it. The grapefruit was underneath everything, so I didn't even realize I was eating the grapefruit until it was in my mouth and I gagged on it. Eck. Gag reflex kicking in as I'm writing this.

Pudding: Toffee ice cream with brandy snaps. But not brandy snaps that are cookies. It was carmelized sugar. Nice. This was my favorite dish.

Funny: Our friend Matt's mom was there. A city of how many million people? And there's Matt's mom?

The Loos: I thought they were gross. High traffic area. Julie thought they were okay.

The Verdict: If I were in Trafalgar Square, I would consider this restaurant for lunch. But as you can tell from this review, I'd have some issues with returning. Plus, even though the menu is trying wonderfully hard, the whole place had this cafeteria-like atmosphere that I couldn't get past. Needed to be darker. With candles. Or something. (We were there for Sunday lunch.)

Cakehole on Columbia Road

Cakehole
Inside Vintage Heaven
82 Columbia Road
E2 7QB

Date of Last Visit: Sunday, 9 March 2008

The Victim: Me

The Damage: 2 quid for a tea.

I was wandering around Columbia Road on Sunday and while I was in one of the shops--Vintage Heaven--I noticed that they had the cutest little cafe in the back. I dropped in for a cuppa and mentioned how I had never noticed the cafe before.

Well, that's because they apparently just opened about a month ago! So I am not out-of-the-loop.

I'll be back for Cream Tea for One soon...doesn't it look like just the place to take your mom or grandma? Or yourself?

Coffee: Coffee Cup

The Coffee Cup
74 Hampstead High Street
NW3 1QX
Tel: 020 7435 7565

Date of Last Visit: Saturday January 12, 2008

The Victims: Joanne, Sean

The Damage: £10 each?

The Background: Joanne and I have known each other since Kindergarten back on Strong Island, but she moved back to England at some point during high school. I believe I've officially seen her three times since then: once at our friend Louise's wedding (also back on The Island), once at The Providores when I first moved to London, and this last time up in Hampstead. Far too infrequently!

Meeting up with someone you've known since the age of five is quite a nice way to pass the afternoon. Particularly when one of your former classmates--the one who was never very nice to you--has become a stripper!!! Yes, it all comes full circle eventually. (Just to clarify in case that stripper bit was confusing...Joanne isn't the stripper.)

We enjoyed huge slices of apple pie with a generous serving of ice cream, washed down by huge cups of tea. It wasn't gourmet, it wasn't fancy, it wasn't the best of anything I've ever had. But that wasn't really the point. So there you go.

The Verdict: I'd go back for the company, the lighting, and the atmosphere. 

Photo originally uploaded on Flickr by Not If You Were The Last Dandy On Earth

Modern British: Rivington Grill

Rivington Grill
28-30 Rivington Street
EC2A 3DZ
020 7729 7053

Date of Last Visit: Tuesday, October 2nd

The Victim: Isabelle

The Damage: £15 each

The Background: I have always wanted to go to the Rivington. I don't know why I haven't before. It's been ages since I've caught up with Isabelle, so I invited her out to lunch. Isabelle, you should know, is "HR." Yes, I had lunch with "HR." (When I'm trying to be funny, I refer to Isabelle and her teammate together as "HR"--in an ironic sense, of course. "Hey, HR, can I borrow your stapler?" I don't think the others get that.)

Anyhow--I called and made the booking by 10 a.m. that morning. We arrive at the Rivington, and they have no record of it, whatsoever. That sucked. But they got us a table anyhow.

The Bread: Is pretty darn good. It's just white bread but it's warm and nice. And it's a LOAF...or well, a half a loaf. Which is so much better than just a few slices in a basket. I'm a fan.

The Entrees: I go for the suckling pig and it's pretty good, but I am not salivating thinking about. (On their Web site, they say it's with broad beans and pea shoots, but I think that's last season's menu as mine was with a mash of some sort.) Isabelle goes for the fish fingers and mushy peas but she gets a nice little pail of chips. And then preceeds to ignore them. I am saddened by this. She lets me have one though. That was nice of her.

Other Thoughts: I needed a sharper knife for my pig. And I'm not sure how I felt about the f word backwards in neon on the wall. Sorry. I am my mother's daughter.

And Some Other Thoughts: I liked that they had a bar that you could eat at. I think I might come in here on my own some day and just have some rarebit on toast.

What Isabelle Thought: I loved the fish fingers and the tartar sauce (which I assume had been made from scratch – it looked and tasted like it had been) the minted pea puree was very tasty as well, the chips were a bit large for my liking, but presented nicely.  I liked the ambience of the restaurant, it felt French to me (but maybe that was just me?) and was surprised how full it was for a Wednesday lunch.  I also remember being surprised when I looked down and saw the table cloth was disposable rather than linen; surprised because the whole place gave the effect of having linen tablecloths (maybe because the napkins were). 

The Verdict: Well, if you read my other thoughts, you know that I'm going to go back to The Rivington for some rarebit and toast.

Totally Unrelated: Are you a new mum in London? If you're looking for great tips on what London mums can do with their kids around town, please visit my friend's site at http://mini-et-moi.com/. It's like Daily Candy or Urban Junkies for moms, and it's all about events and locales that mothers in London would enjoy with tot in tow.

A Local Caf: Market Restaurant

132 Whitecross Street
EC1Y 8QJ
Tel:  02072535176

Date of Last Visit: Sunday, August 12, 2007

The Victim: Me

The Damage: About £5

Jens Lekman – I saw her in the anti war demostration

After more than a week of clean living (no meat, no carbs, no alcohol, lots of exercise, lots of water--more to come on this later) I had a hankering for a ham and cheese omelette. So after a great workout at my gym, I hoofed it over to the Market Cafe to load up on protein.

I like the Market Cafe. They are just so very friendly in there. The food, to be honest, isn't going to knock your socks off. It's basic. Like ham and cheese omelettes and bacon butties. (Did I spell butties right?) But it's always delivered with such a smile!

I'm not the only one who likes them. Walk by at any point in the morning, and the little patio is packed. (Just not in this picture.) In fact, I just walked by at 10:15 on a Saturday morning and there wasn't a free table in the place.

Ah, and I didn't mention the prices. They're fantastic. So low!

The Verdict: Between the smiles and the prices, I just keep coming back.

Modern British: Arbutus

63-64 Frith St
W1D 3JW
020 7734 4545

Date of Last Visit: Friday, July 20, 2007

The Victim: Amy

The Damage: £65 each

The Background: Amy is in town from California...her second visit since I've been in London. I know her from grad school, where we were wine club co-chairs. Good times. Except for washing all those glasses after our events. That sucked big time. But through it all, I learned that I can count on Amy for being up for spending money on dinner, so I suggest Arbutus.

The Entrance: When I call to make my booking, we do the little booking dance. I ask for 8 p.m. They tell me no, they can only do 9 p.m. I say that's too late. They hesitate. They hem and haw. Then suddenly, they "find" a table for 8:15 p.m.

Well guess what? At 8:15 p.m., the restaurant is empty. And it doesn't seem much fuller at 9 p.m. Or 9:30 p.m. Hmmm. Remember it's a Friday. One day, I will understand this process.

The Wine: I love the way the wine works at Arbutus. Everything is available in 250 ml carafes. I love carafes. And as former co-chairs of the wine club, Amy and I are in our element. Although I still have that thought...I think I know more than most about wine, but I still know less than many--like Amy. We start with something French and white. And then move on to an Austrian red. (I am in love with Austrian wines this year.) And then we move on to New Zealand (or maybe it was Australia), and we finish with some Tokay from Hungary. Very fun.

The Starters: I have the pig's head and it is mouth-watering. Really delicious and tender. I am very pleased.

The Mains: My rabbit stew was a little too rabbit-y for me. They served three rolls of rabbit, and they were just a tad too rich. I couldn't finish the third. But the cottage pie of rabbit...now that was FANTASTIC. But again, so rich that I couldn't finish it. But guess what? I expressed my wonder at the deliciousness, and my sadness to see the rabbit go, and our server offered to box it up for me. BOX IT UP? In a Michelin-starred restaurant? Wow.

I fall slightly in love with Arbutus right there. And our server. He's really great. Really. He knows the wine. He knows the food. I feel like we are in good hands.

The Loos: Eh. They can do better.

Tap Water Test: Passed.

The Verdict: Between the wines by carafe and the cottage pie and the take-away box, they've got my vote. Just work on the booking efficiency and the loos. And the slightly hotel-bar-esque decor.